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Ceit

no pie

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Chouffe is one of those Belgian beers you see in all the “Irish” pubs of the day, the ones that are really just import beer bars for people who want to be a little sophisticated, but not very daring. It’s not that it’s a bad beer, but it is a little on the normal side. And also Belgian. Not exactly my thing. However, I do like to try something different every once in a while and sometimes I feel something of a sweet tooth for my beer (ahem, pastry, cough). I have had La Chouffe Cherry already at Taproom, and it was an experience, but I’m curious about the tiny bottle version. It is that cute little bottle that they have, and the dwarf hanging out on the label. Could it be more concentrated than the tap? Or maybe a different blend altogether, having been in the bottle for who knows how long? I’m up for an experiment!

There’s a strong cherry aroma just of the beer being poured and the color is a startling dark rusty red. The head looks firm and fluffy, just a touch of off-white. It’s definitely a cherry beer, with both flavors hitting hard on the first sip. It has the flavor of Mort Subité but it’s a cleaner drink, not leaving anything behind once you swallow. In the middle of that drink though, it’s rough and dominating, grabbing all your attention. It’s sweet enough, but not as cloying as other cherry beers, a little more “natural” maybe. There really isn’t any beer aftertaste or ghostly background in the flavor, unlike in some flavored beers. Maybe that concentrated cherry juice just wipes out any beeriness it comes across. Or maybe the black carrot juice. Oh yeah, that’s what the label says. Suddenly goth beer, isn’t it?

Supplier: Lambeer
Price: €4.35

all good things

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It’s time for bottle number three from my gift pack, the only one that appeared to have its full volume. This is the pale ale, “Smash” pale ale, although the name makes you expect the typical lager. As far as I know, cerveza rubia has been in the lager style at least since lagers were introduced. All of the labels had some subtle and slightly surreal designs on them, but Rubia clearly shows a guinea pig on one side and a cat on the other. I do not know the reason. There isn’t even a quirky name to point to a fairy tale or weird ass children’s show.

Once again, extremely fizzy and well-headed, lovely golden color and subtle but standard beery aroma. It hits hard on the tongue with its carbonation, but the taste is right up the alley of any ale fan. It’s in-your-face bitter, but with a little garnish of grain to keep it floating. Like the weiss, it has a bigger, bolder body than I associate with the style, but it’s still a smooth and happily drunk brew. It is, perhaps, even more summery than La Balluca’s weiss, with a somewhat simpler profile and a less layered flavor experience. A little time brings out some sourness and turns down the bitter, leaving a more candied feel to the whole business. Of course, I will turn my eyes to darker horizons after this, but it was a nice little interlude of local beers that I wouldn’t have come across otherwise. The beer stores of yore will be missed, and sorely.

harvesting

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I didn’t see any leakage on the bottle, but this La Balluca Weissbier also had a lower level of liquid than you would expect to see. I’m going to trust that it is also still in drinking condition, having been kept from light and heat (for the most part). It looks like a pretty standard weiss, very short ingredient list, all natural. Things are really heating up these days on the street, so it would be nice to have something to cool down with on an August evening.

Yep, not quite regulation level

A little hissy under the cap, but looks good pouring and has a little wheaty tang to the smell. The head is fluffy, white, and does collapse into a manageable amount within half a minute. The beer is clear gold, showing off a lively amount of carbonation. The taste is stronger and heavier than I would expect from a wheat, with a little graininess but a big dark bitter spot. It has a crafty feel thanks to that roughness, not as sweet and effervescent as more industrial or at least bigger brand wheats. It’s less summery and refreshing than many of them are, but it’s true that a lot of wheat beers do have some pretty hefty body to them. There is a little sediment in the bottom, so the last bit of pouring should be done with care.

exploded

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Sometimes people like to help you in your hobbies. When your hobby involves food and drink, it’s always easy to pick up a little something on a trip as a gift. Even now, there are local microbreweries and craft breweries working along steadily, supporting local hop farms and bars. I have not heard of La Balluca, maybe if some of the old beer stores were still open they would have had a few bottles. As it is, a pack of three bottles was gifted to me by a friend who was taking a trip through Guadalajara. They all looked like pale ales at first, but on opening the package I saw that there was an English brown, a wheat, and, yes, one pale ale. The brown and the wheat seem to have had some mishap occur; both of them were missing some liquid and the brown had some residue around the cap where some leakage must have happened. In spite of the loss, it’s mostly there, and probably still perfectly fine, so into the shitty fridge with 5 Maltas brown!

Uh oh
Hmmmmm
Seems a little low, yep

It is certainly a brown ale, cloudy with an off-white head, and a sweet-and-sour aroma. It’s like a lemon glazed cinnamon roll. The head dies back pretty quickly, but not completely, leaving a little cap. It has a strong malty flavor, with a little bit of gritty texture. The sourness is also there, very light, just balancing the bready, grainy taste. It has the hallmarks of its style, the warm roundness, the tingles on the tongue, it hits high notes for summer and low notes for times of less oppressive temperatures. As expected, the shitty fridge did not cool this beer way down, even in a bottle over a couple of days, but it works well with the style. It’s a soothing beer for the evening, probably not one that would take center stage, but it’s a welcome accompaniment.

what’s his story anyway?

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Hoo boy, it’s really summer now! Not my favorite season, really, even though I am blessed with A/C at the moment. Maybe it’s my aversion to beaches that turns me off of the season. Also, the dearth of dark beers in the past. This year there are a few more stouts around than other years, which certainly warms my heart, and you’ve already seen some evidence of my enjoyment. This is the last one from La Mundial, a Lervig Imperial Stout with a name that makes me thing there ought to be a story – Konrad’s Stout. Can’t find a story in a quick Google search, but maybe that’s a Google problem. We’re having more and more of those.

Beer float worthy head, thick and bubbly, and a little nest of tiny bubbles at the bottom. It’s slightly cakey in aroma, but only a mild whiff. It smells fresh and bready, almost perky. Tastewise, it is a full-fledged stout, bitter and toasty warm. It warns of coffee or licorice, but doesn’t quite go there, staying strong in its stouty identity. It doesn’t quite feel as strong as its 10%, but it definitely has presence. It’s also fairly clean going down, not a whole lot of afterfeel, although there is a little bit of film on the back of the tongue reminding you that you have had a drink. In a way it’s good, since you don’t have the desire to just chug the thing. As usual, it might be too heavy for some given the weather, but I have no problems sitting in a shady place and enjoying a fine northern stout.

Supplier: La Mundial
Price: €5.20

moonlighting

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We are past the longest day of the year, and in Madrid the changes are actually easily noticeable from week to week. Still, it isn’t quite time for drinks outside under the moon. I mean, you could wait until night and moon are fully in force, but the atmosphere can be a bit oppressive on the ears. Much better to have your favorite style at home and at your leisure. Oh yes, the favorite style, you know what’s coming now. This time it’s a German-US collab, so that ought to be fun. It certainly has an intriguing label, this Dead Moon Cove. It looks a little like a classic Halloween movie poster. Will Third Moon Brewing and Sudden Death Brewing give us something so good it’s scary? Or just a horror?

It pours out thick and oily, barely letting any head build up at all. It smells like a bakery. Pretty much that’s it, a bakery. One that never burns the product and uses the best chocolate and vanilla. It’s another thick one, almost like a melted milkshake, but really it’s thicker than that. It’s almost like drinking chocolate syrup, except there’s an extra level of flavor besides the chocolate part. The alcohol sits boldly in the middle with a halo of decadent sweeteners around it, like the most extravagant 18th-century dessert. I’m saying 18th-century because after all my video watching, my impression is that they just didn’t overload their taste buds the way we do, although they did like a little, quality, spice like vanilla and cinnamon. Oh yeah, some cinnamon wanders out too. The glass is positively covered with a sticky film after the beer has been there, something they say about stronger alcohol sometimes. It’s not a beer that I would identify merely as imperial stout, although it does have strength and majesty about it, but one of the better crafted pastry stouts. The rich bakery sensations are there, as is an exceptionally weighty mouthfeel, but it’s restrained and refined, not punch you in the dental work sweet. Highly enjoyable, any day of the year for me, maybe with some ice cream just out the freezer for the rest. They say stouts are having a moment this year, but I think this one might be stronger than most people want at poolside. Missing out, I say!

Supplier: La Mundial
Price: €9.90

a toast, to the past and future

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Number two stout from my last foraging, Basqueland’s Seven Minute Siesta. It sounds more like some kind of IPA than the Imperial Pastry Stout is claims to be, but we’ll see if there isn’t a surprise in the can. It might be that an 11% beer is just the thing to knock you out for seven minutes. This is part of their 10th anniversary series, one of the two stouts in a sextet of other ales, including a black IPA. For some reason, it seems to me like Basqueland ought to be even older than 10, but we must remember that the 2010s was the high point of establishment of Spanish craft beer. 2015 is a solid year to be born. Actually, it’s my nephew’s birth year too, so it must have been a year for crazy creative things to come into the world.

Again, very appetizing going into the glass, with a very fluffy mocha colored head and more tiny bubbles than I was expecting. As the head dies back I take a whiff of a cakey, fruity, chocolate syrupy beer. It has the aroma of the best kind of pastry stout, the one that has sweetness but isn’t a sugar bomb. A deeper sniff brings up some toasty maltiness too. The mouthfeel is surprisingly thick, much more robust than I thought it was going to be. The sweetness is well-balanced, strong but not overwhelming. It’s something akin to dark chocolate, doing away with the bitterness of stouts without drowning the flavor in lactose or sucrose. While filling, it was not very sticky at first, although there is some build-up in the mouth over time. It doesn’t leave much of an aftertaste, just the sensation of having your tongue varnished. And not shitty cheap stuff either, high-class celebratory shine for the ages. Happy birthday to you, Basqueland, may you keep your quality and your market for decades to come.

Supplier: La Mundial
Price: €8

not fried

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I had quite the selection before me at La Mundial. I feel sorry for Lorien, who seemingly happily brought down all the examples of stout from the shelves and dug a few out of the fridge too. I guess it’s his job and all, but there were people coming and going and it has to be a distraction to have a bunch of beer all lined up on the counter, waiting to go back to their proper places of display. Anyway, I did see a few that looked like they should not be passed up. Although it’s part of the ethos to do your best to consume locally, I just had the urge to be international this time. I did of course buy a national beer, but the one I have now came from Scotland. It’s Vault City’s Mini Mars. This “stellar” stout is certainly going to be more of a dessert than a meal, or even than just a snack. It might be mini, but these things have a way of punching above their weight, if they’re any good that is.

Powerfully pastry aroma, with the vanilla giving it a touch of cola. There is a good head – for about 5 seconds and then it dissipates, also cola-like. It’s still a good, dark brown color, though. There’s also the chocolate and caramel notes that you would expect from its namesake. Although it flows easily and doesn’t look like a thick beer, it definitely has a heavy feel. The caramel is dominant in the first sip and leaves a stouty bitter aftertaste. There’s a feeling of consuming something burned or at least caramelized, something that almost tastes like it should be crispy. It leaves a little tickle on the tongue, again harking back to the cola with its fizz, but is otherwise smooth. Even the “burned” taste is not very abrasive. Although thick and mouthfilling, it’s a slippery and easy beer for drinking. It is probably fortunate that it isn’t especially alcoholic, although the impression is one of a much stronger beer. It’s a beer that shoots for the stars, and at least for me, it’s out of this world.

Supplier: La Mundial
Price: €7.10

gift of the gods, yeah those ones

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In spite of, well, everything, there’s nothing like a stout to calm your nerves. And sometimes it’s nice to have a stronger one than normal, one with a little more oomph. If it happens to have a cool label too, so much the better. It was both the label and the name that pulled my hand right to Abduction in Be Hoppy’s fridge; pink rainbow unicorns can’t be ignored and above the name? Double fudge barrel aged. Fall on your knees, this is now your god. Lo, it has descended from the heavens. I would call the aliens on the lest hand side of the can Simpsonsesque, although that’s probably only because of the cyclops look. The two-eyed one on the right reminds me more of Toejam and Earl. I wonder of the people at Pipeworks have those influences in their pasts. They are from Chicago, so it’s certainly possible.

It’s promising in the pour, looking thick and sleek, and oh my god it’s as chocolately and liquory as you would ever want in a beer. I tasted even before sniffing, and there’s a good layer of graham cracker in the aroma, but the same notes of the flavor are present. Every piece of the style description comes out, with a slightly bitter stout entrance, a long cocoa road and a sweet bourbon tail-end. It develops kind of a tang as you drink and leaves a syrupy coating on the glass. At some point, the wood of the barrels starts making an appearance and you think the whole can might have been a bad bet to make. Eyes bigger than your stomach, as it were. It’s delicious, but definitely heavy. It’s a little strong in alcohol and in nature to be an accompanying drink, to a dessert or anything else, but it’s certainly a course of its own.

Supplier: Be Hoppy
Price: €13.95

no punch

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The only nice thing about not being in the city center should be having less cement around you, but this neighborhood is at least as paved as any central neighborhood. Yes, there are some dirt areas trying to nourish some plant life, but the streets and the luxuriously wide sidewalks are all cemented and bricked and fake stoned, and they do not stop being little ovens after the sun goes down. Last week, when it was very windy, it was bearable, I must admit. Anyway, enough complaints, it’s time for a drink! This one impressed the guy at Hidden Beers when I pulled it out of the fridge and he waxed eloquent over its positive qualities. It’s an IPA, with no other qualifiers, from Triple Crossing in Virginia, very well made, very stable, very drinkable. It certainly looks to me like it has aspirations. Ready to fly into the sun, perhaps. Here comes Falcon Smash!

Once again, an abundance of foam in the first pour. It’s not quite completely white, and very bubbly. The beer itself is bright gold and just a little cloudy. It gives off a typical IPA aroma, slightly citrus and gruffly hoppy underneath. Most of the head vanishes in a minute or so, leaving a sort of crown around the edges of the glass. A fried egg of a beer, looking down on it. There’s a lot more forest in this IPA than tropics, tilting it towards more classic English styles with a touch of West Coast. It has a snap of citrus at first, but it gets rolled over with pine and climbing vines. Although smooth and light, it has a stickiness that hangs around the mouth, without any unpleasant aftertaste, just a sensation of just having swallowed something. While it looks like the perfect summertime beer, it has a deep almost bitter to it that lurks and clings, and might make it less refreshing than you want for a sidewalk drink. Inside, with the A/C wafting over you, you might just have a winner.

Supplier: Hidden Beers
Price: €9.99

PS. I learned about a week ago that Chinaski has shut its doors, so there goes another craft bar in town. Sure, they have a taproom in Valdemoro, but how often do I go there? Maybe I should look into it.

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